Crush

“For a man, a platonic friend is a woman you was trying to fuck, made a wrong turn somewhere, and ended up in the ‘friend-zone’. Oh no! I’m in the friend-zone!”–Chris Rock

A lot of men have been here, at least once. You go out with your best friend to dinner. She’s upset about her lame boyfriend for some reason. After a good amount of eating, laughing, and paying, you end up at your house where she gives you a giant hug, a kiss on the cheek, and lovely goodbye. “Thanks, you’re my best friend. There’s no one else who would understand.” During this ritual, again, you find yourself yelling inside your head, “Kiss her, you puss!” But you don’t. Instead you see her walking to her car, shutting the door, and driving to the guy she’s seeing. Good guy: 0 Bad boy: 1….